Its so hard...i got married years ago but left because didnt feel he deserved to be tied down with this. I raised my kids alone for 21yrs now they are legally adults i still feel like im a failure. I have always helped everyone down to the last penny i would have, i even today give what i have n try when i dont have. I use to do yard sales for extra money, and lots of the items i get and have i just give away now. I am a jack of all trades, so i can fix and do almost anythibg and i am the one my fam and friends rely on for all, but now im in need and cant even get a call to say....hi how are u, do u need anything???? Thats what hurts.
From my income being fixed now, i cant even afford to pay rent " and" utilities( shame) ....crying...again! So i stay at my moms on the floor and pay rent monthly for a house with no electric with all my belongings just because i cant pay two things, but i figure someday i will get enough to at least pay the deposits to get them on.
I know its hard for all right now, but to just have a listenibg ear is a blessing rightnow. I needa car bad to get back and forth to my doc visits, i had to move from wash dc to sc, because my only ride is my grandmother who will take me but i had to change docs because she still cant drive at night and my only doc i had since being diag was the duke university sickle cell center, besides howard ssd cetr in dc...n it takes us 3 hours to get there n 3 hrs back. It turns dark fazt. Its just rough and from what i read so far on hete all of you know.
I just need any kind of running vehicle that can carry a wheelchair and or walker...trunk is fine. I dont care how old it is just thst it gets me to and from and i will keep trying for a Blessing to give me energy,change of heart,mind,soul! I am sooo depressed, very. But cant even see a counselor, unless they come pick me up.
In dc they had so many help programs but here is where i got sick soon after relocating. I came to rock hill because my mom moved back and my kids were at the time younger and i felt that raising them in aslower area it would help. And it did in some ways but made it worst in otbers. But i have a mom that is almost 80yrz old whose fixed income is hers but she tries to help to her best. Now my oldest girl has had a baby( im a granndma yaye!) And its even harder.
But i know im going on and on but thats what the site says do so i am explaining my situation for the first time and hope God finally send me my angel....because i need one, by myside every second.! Just motivation and help, liztening eRs, helping hands. I need all i can get.
I also can help where i can, i still get clothing donations for my old yard sale business but now i just give them away and Bless others, its just financially im am having a very stressful,depressing,straing hardship.
Thank you all for listening, and to know more or my whole story in depth, just ask anything you want, im not ashamed to tell you nothing, i just ask that before you judge me know the real complete story first, i can take being criticized, but attacking is hard. So please just contact me privately. I will offer my number, and we can talk but dont attack noone on here or nowhere. Never seen it on here but many other sites i have seen where people down n need lifting and get overly judged just for being in need???? Why?. As i said if i can help anyone with anything i do have please ask, i have many clothing items lots of sizes men,women,kids, plus and shoes, small to large. I just dont have funds for a car,bills,nor can i setup anymore because of the outside temps now being hot, n i have an oxygen tank.
So please if anyone know a counselor, spiritual,or educated...i NEED one. Ok im going to go now. please be Blessed! Ty for listening.
